Dr Miller=My Hero

Wow.  I do not think I have had such a rough patch since Sydney was weening off her meds 10 months ago. Since getting her "diagnosis", things have been a little crazy around here.  The diet continues to be working, in fact, the days when we don't see much verbal response from her I later find out was/is due to a slip in the diet.  So, we are keeping up with the GF/CF diet even though it is impossible to find all of the ingredients needed to bake any one item.  I have been blogging, searching, and creating a lot of different recipes so that we has a family can do this together, I now just need to find where to buy the food.  It has been going OK and I am getting more used to the idea of the diet (I dont know if Cameron can say the same).We have found that it is hard to just feed Sydney one thing and the family different which has been a challenge.  She wants what we are having, so this has come at the expense of some of our favorite foods.  Just yesterday Cameron sat down at the table with his pizza and without thinking pulled out the ranch dressing. I immediately forced him outta the room but not without Syd seeing it first and crying for her ranch.  Poor girl.  If we want to sit as a family at dinner time, we have to give up some things.  Cheese and Ranch are going to be the biggies.

Since starting the diet, Syds sleep has been EVERYWHERE.  She has never been a great sleeper.  Not even a good sleeper, but now its just ridiculous.  In the past she could go 5 sometimes even 10 days between early morning wake up calls at 3 am.  Now its nearly everyday and she wake ups anywhere between 1-5am.  It is really strange.  In an attempt to stay sane, Cameron and I agreed to finally try some kind of sleep medicine.  I know its not great for young kids, but neither is not sleeping!  So, we went to the pediatrician who finally decided to believe me, but still said there was nothing he could prescribe since she has a seizure disorder and since so many meds lower the threshold for more seizure activity.  It sucked.  I once again found myself in a dr.s office with nothing.  No help, no guidance, and just a "I understand your frustration but there isn't anything we can do" response.  I was SO mad!  And this time I made myself known.  You can imagine it; astrong willed, extremely emotional, worried, and sleep deprived Britney raising hell saying, "Now that you believe me you are telling me that you can't help me!?" and "I can't take no for an answer right now... there is no way I am leaving this office with nothing".  I was pissed!  And I was TIRED!  And I was loud and sobbing at the same time...its a funny picture to imagine...and even funnier one to see I am sure.  (I am an ugly crier for sure.)  My dr. at that point decided to go and speak to the other dr.s in  the building and even paged one that was out and came back with something that could possibly help. The melatonin which we have tried and not had success with but this time he tripled the dose! There really isn't much they could do aside from that, and I understand that, but I still needed help..something that would work.  That night knowing that we couldn't do much more of Syds sleep stuff, Cameron called a friend of his, Dr. Miller, (who is a pediatric specialist in town) and left a message on his personal phone.

Sunday night, we got a call back from this Dr. who called on his night off and talked about Syd for nearly an hour on the phone. What a guy! He told us about some new therapies and got us an appt with him 2 days later.  Today is that day.  I had a wonderful 2 hour visit with him where he quickly affirmed what I was thinking, "before anything else, we need to takle this sleep problem". YES!  "Whos to tell if its the sleep alone causing her brain to stop functioning?"

Along with this, he confirmed my feelings about Syds "diagnosis".  "She is really right on the line right now" he said. "Some would say she is on the spectrum while others would say shes not." There really is no test that will say one way or another.  This is why it has been so difficult for dr's to daignose and see specific tendencies as autistic. It is comforting though because it means she is higher functioning if at all. We both agreed to treat her as if she is in fact on the spectrum, since exta treatment couldn't hurt, and we are going ahead with Menthyl b-12 injections once every three days.  I start Friday! EEK!  I am excited about this new treatment as it is a vitamin not a medicine and it has proven to help a lot of people.  Dr. Miller alone has an 80 percent success rate with it.  Sydney oddly enough, fits the criteria for to a T.  (Higher functioning with specific delays in speech) It sounds like it was custom made for her! :) (Hows that for optimism!?)

So that is it for now.  Dr. Miller turned out to be the just the person that we needed in our lives right now. I am so lucky that Cameron knows him and has a personal /professional relationship with him. It has really helped get us in quickly and he had more of a vested interest since Cameron is a fellow employee.  He was so respectful, kind and honest and he is someone who will work with us, not against us. It was refreshing!  I AM SO EXCITED to see what we together can do for Syd!

Anyway, I can't wait to see what the future brings.  If anyone has any yummy GFCF foods or recipes to share, I would love them.  Apparently I am gonna be on this diet for quite a while. (At least 2 years!  AKKKK!)

I also want to thank you all for your support at this time.  It has meant a lot to us, and even if I can't respond to your emails and things now, just know that they are EXTREMELY appreciated.  It takes a village to raise a child and I am more aware of that now more than ever.

First Crush

Dylan came off the school bus saying, "Mom, look in m backpack!"
I pulled this out:

Dylan: Mommy (pointing to the picture), this one is Mckenna and this one is me.  I looked at her eyes today and they are really brown.
Mom: Wow Dylan. You must really like her.
Dylan: Yup
Mom: I didn't know you knew how to draw a persons profile.  How did you learn how to do that?
Dylan:  Well I see a lot of kissing!
Dylan:  Mommy do you want to know how we became friends?
Mom: Yes!
Dylan: I whispered in her ear like this (as he leans in to whisper) and said, I wanna marry you when I grow up. and then we were always friends after that.

Weighted Blanket a Success!

 Look what we made!   After a long day of sewing, hoses, and funnels, we finally finished Sydney's weighted blanket. I think we filled something like 190 squares.  It feels like a blanket with lots of mini bean bags sewn together.  Its kind of cool actually. My amazing mother in law helped me all day yesterday to complete this.  It definitely was a labor of love if you ask me. It took a while, but it was actually really fun to do and a bit comical at times as we were trying to figure it out along the way.  I will say this (and I have said it before),  there aren't many people that love to be with their mother in law for hours on end...but Elaine rocks, and I am NOT one of those people.  She is one of my closest friends, and I am so lucky to have her in my life.  Thanks Elaine for everything!

Here is Syd right after she opened her new present:

This is the back (you can see the squares better)

Here she is the next morning.  Notice her old blankie on the floor.  SCORE!  She loves her new blanket and now drags this 7 lbs thing everywhere.  I hope it holds up!

 Check out the shiner Sydney came home with from school yesterday.  It's a rug burn! OUCH!

 "BE CAREFUL!"

Sydney's Story

As many of you know, we have been through a lot with our darling Sydney over the last 3 years. Her behaviors and learning delays were always chalked up to be caused by her seizure disorder that she has had since 9 months. I have always felt that there was something else wrong, but we could never quite pinpoint it. Her strange behaviors were always concerning to me, especially her wake up calls at 1, 2, or 3 am.  Her sleep habits alone cause me to nearly go insane, but it was the rejection and responses from the doctors that made it worse.  They blamed me for not being "strict enough" with her sleep schedule. For not being "hard enough" on my child.  "Just keep at it" they said, "she will come around", "just keep a routine".  I felt worthless. I felt inadequate.  I felt like the worst mother in the world.  Why could I not get my child to go back to sleep after waking at 2 am? It didn't make sense to me or the doctors, so yes, I blamed myself...for the last 3 years!  It wasn't until about 4 months ago that I really started to believe that I wasn't the one to blame. There was a problem, and I wasn't going to pretend that it wasn't there anymore. So rather than continue to take Sydney to doctors, I became a researcher.    I would spend those early mornings researching on the internet possible explanations as to why she did things the way that she did.  I came up with a few hypothesis, a couple that didn't pan out (sleep apnea, migraines, etc.).  But, over the few months my husband and I really started seeing things in Sydney that could put her on "the spectrum". We thought maybe PDD-NOS. I called her therapist Cami, about 6 weeks ago and told her my concerns and how I truly did not believe that this was all "just a delay".  Once again, she reassured me that Sydney was not autistic, nor did she have these "tendencies", she was just "delayed a bit".

Four weeks later after more research, I was convinced that Sydney had Sensory Integration or Processing Disorder which was to blame for keeping her awake at night.  She has always been very sensitive to light, she screams when she has her socks put on wrong,  she sleeps naked with her "soft blanket" on her, she is very sensitive to touch and hated being cuddled as a baby, etc.  There were/are many signs of this, so I called a local OT who specialized in this disorder to set up an evaluation.  While talking to her on the phone she asked, "does she sleep on the floor?"  "YES!"  I said(feeling validated), "will she sleep in her bed even if you put her there?"  "No, she moves to the floor".  She continued to ask questions that began to make sense, questions that I now knew fit Sydney to a T for SPD. Sydney has a sensory issue, which is why she likes to lay on the cold couch or kitchen floor when she wakes in the middle of the night, which is why she cries when the lights turn on, etc. The therapist quickly told me that Sydney obviously had sensory issues and that I should put her in OT.  That day, I called Cami again at school to talk more about this.  During this phone call Cami told me, "we can't help Sydney for the sensory things because it doesn't affect her learning, but I have been wanting to call you to talk about doing another evaluation, this time for autism".  My jaw dropped.  "after you pointed it out to me Mrs Mount, I have begun seeing the autistic tendencies that you were speaking about, and I really want to get her evaluated again soon, how is next week?"

After hanging up the phone I immediately researched autism.  This was the first time that I allowed myself to really research anything about the subject.  I read about the gluten free/casein free diet and how it has helped many children with Autism.  Four days later Sydney had another early morning, this time at 1 am.  So, here I was researching. Again.  That morning we started Sydney on the Casein free diet.  I just wanted to try it.  I have read that allergies and food sensitivities are different so I thought, maybe she does just have a sensitivity to milk, why not eliminate it and see? While dropping Sydney off that morning (Wednesday) I asked her teacher if Sydney still wasn't talking in class.  She told me, "she will tell me when she has to use the bathroom and that's about it".  After 4 months Sydney still was not speaking in class.

SO.  LISTEN TO THIS.

Three days later after starting the casein free diet, I picked Sydney up from school (Friday) and her teacher tells me (without knowing about the diet), "she has not stopped talking all day".  WOW!  We went home and Sydney sang three songs that I had NEVER heard before.  She identified 2 letters (H and O), which again she has NEVER done, and she had her first conversation ever with me. I asked her what she did at school that day (which usually is responded with a blank stare and a grunt or two), and she replied, "I played with Daniel."  What else? "I read books".  What else? "I played in the gym".  The tears began to stream as I was listening to my baby girl recall events of the day, something she had never done before.  Something that was only just beginning.

We immediately took Syd off Gluten and the results are undeniable.  What Cameron and I have witnessed in the last 8 days are nothing short of a miracle.  I have been brought to tears at least once a day, (and Cameron too!)  What seems to be a huge development to us, probably wouldn't be noticeable to someone who has not lived with Syd, but let me give you a few examples of these remarkable changes:

1.  These conversations have continued.  Today after being picked up from school and asked about her day said, "I played outside","I played on the slide", and "I read Humpty Dumpty".  She recalled a specific book!  DETAILS!
2.  A couple days ago we were downstairs and I gave Sydney a task; to get her underwear out of the laundry pile.  She stopped looking and went over to play guitar with Cameron and after about 3 minutes went back to the task saying, "I need to find my underpants".  There was no redirection...she just did it!   This has happened a couple of times.
3. Her sentences are longer, and its as if she is actually thinking before speaking now.  She walked into Grandmas today and said, "I wonder where Grandma is...maybe shes upstairs".  She knows wonder?  And maybe?  Who knew!?
4.  At the dinner table the other night she began using her hands while we were singing songs.  She was mimicking our hand movements (something she rarely ever does).  She did 5 songs in a row with more excitement and accuracy than I have ever seen.  (usually she will sit and just stare during these songs).  This one even made Cameron a bit teary.

There are so many things that we are seeing on a daily basis. It is amazing.  Yes we probably are seeing some things that have been there all along, just because we are looking, but I guarantee that this diet is doing something.  Her teacher said again yesterday, "I have never seen her talk like this".  It is wonderful.  It makes sense that diet effects our bodies, I just hate that it took me so long to see these "intolerance's.

Sydney was evaluated on Tuesday with the autistic specialist and was unofficially diagnosed with some form of autism.  The social integration and epilepsy are believed to all be part of the autism. So now what?  My heart sank, the tears ran, and the therapist just apologized again and again for not seeing it sooner. "We are very upfront to parents when we see signs, I just always thought these things were caused by the seizures" she said.  Who can blame her?  Everyone has felt the same.  Everyone but me.  Now I have a bit of validation, but who cares?  There wasn't a sigh or relief, just pain and worry.  I am just so upset worried for my daughter and her future.  I just can't believe it.  Truly, I still am in denial.  It is one thing to THINK something,  but it is an entirely different thing when you KNOW and have proof of something. The news hit me pretty hard.  I still wonder when I will come to grips with it.

For now I am just doing everything I can to control the situation and keep my mind from getting too depressed.  I don't want to dwell over this because really,  Sydney is still the same old sweet Sydney.  Nothing has changed.    But there is something so daunting about the word Autism. Its so harsh. Its so real. There is too much uncertainty that comes along with it. I immediately went out and bought a mini trampoline (I read it helps), I decided to enlist the help of my mother in law to make a special weighted blanket, and I have been gung ho with this crazy diet. I don't know what is harder, making the food, or driving around the city looking for the nasty stuff. It took me about 3 hours the first day just reading labels, which of course, again, had me in tears. Luckily I met a sweet lady who helped me along the way (she told me that she instantly knew I was crying over ingredients as she had been in that same position 10 years prior). It was comforting and a bit humorous, I felt pretty ridiculous.  But really, YOU try doing a food search (but don't try walmart!) There are few foods out there that dont contain both milk and gluten. I had no idea!  This diet is so dang hard to follow, and so time consuming, but I am doing it and doing it right. Sydney is worth it even if it turns out to all me a hoax. I have to try it. I have to try something!  I am keeping busy and keeping my spirits up and when I find a good recipe (like the banana oat bars, it makes my day!)  I have faith, probably more now than ever before, and that is  strange for me. I know that it will work out, I am just worried about figuring out the kinks along the way.

I hope that we will continue to see more improvements, and that I will see this as a blessing and not a curse.  It is good to finally have answers. Its sucks to have these particular answers, but now we can help Sydney in the best possible way and that has to account for something right?  Had the word autism never come out of Cami's mouth, I never would have even considered this crazy diet.  There is a positive right? Lets keep em comin!

(Oh and did I mention that during all of this (this week), Macey had bronchitis, and Cameron started teaching early morning seminary?  Life is awesome.

Christmas Vacation

19 days that the kids were out of school for Christmas Vacation.  Just thinking about it gives me hives

1 amazing neighbor named Gracie moved in next door and plays with Dylan outside EVERYDAY.  She is a life saver! She is 11, but she loves Dylan, and loves having someone to play with everyday. They get off the bus together, run to their homes to get a snack and drop off bags,  and then they are outside until dark.  I love it!  He is such a big boy!

2 is for the amount of swings that Dylan and Gracie built together.  They found a tire in the woods and made a tire swing hanging from our front deck.  They later decided to hang a swing from our back deck and I must say, it is pretty awesome.  Even I enjoy playing on it!

4 is for the amount of times that Dylan reappeared during in his magic trick:

and also for the number of times I found Sydney asleep on my closet floor. (Anything to help her go to sleep, but can she quit hiding!?)
                                                   

We enjoyed  celebrating the New Year with a bunch of friends at Lisa Anderson's home.  The kids all stayed up past midnight (thanks to the naps we forced that day) and they were great!  It was super fun! I am excited to see what 2012 brings to our family!

 I am so glad break is over, but we sure had a lot fun!

Christmas 2011

I know this post should have come before the New Years one, but I am a bit slow with pics and the new format on blogger.  Sorry.  

This was our favorite Christmas yet!  This was our first year ever doing Christmas alone at home.  It was so nice!  I love having extended family around during the holidays, but it is so nice to be able to stay at home and go at your own pace, do your own traditions, and wake up in your own beds.  It was wonderful!  The other reason why this turned out to be our favorite year to date, is the fact that it was on a Sunday and we had church services to remember the day of our Saviors birth.  We thought it might be kind of frustrating in the morning with the kids having them stop opening their gifts to go to church, but it turned out to be perfect, and it was a beautiful service.  The kids didn’t mind one bit, and it allowed them to remember the real reason as to why we celebrate Christmas.  I wish this holiday fell on a Sunday every year.

Getting ready for Christmas with a ghetto gingerbread house.  Come on...its pretty rockin.  The kids were home, it was cold outside, and in my pantry lay a brand new box of graham crackers and a bin of halloween candy.  SCORE!

Check out the pile of nerds.  Sydney was more a fan of dumping rather than spreading.

This pic is more for the wall of awesome art that my kids made throughout the month.  I LOVE having this art display. (If you check out the bell to the left it only has 2 more rings on it till Christmas!)


Christmas Eve and Grandma and Grandpa's house: dinner, gift exchange, and a white elephant gift exchange.  It was super fun!  I LOVE living close to family…it makes holidays so much more fun and  meaningful.  My nieces and nephews are awesome…when they aren’t piling on top of each other ;)

Two pees in a pod.  Casey and Dylan could not be any cuter together.

Watching the Christmas story was a lot easier on the kids than listening to it being read aloud. It is a lot quieter and I think they definitely got more out of it.

The kids sang the "12 sayings of Grandpa" to him that night.  My favorite: "why's the fence around the cemetery?" and "platter!"

Grandpa dogpile!  "Not the camera!"

                     Look at these sweet girls together.  Maddie is such a good friend to her cousin!  

 Shoot, we didn't get any of Dylan opening his rad Darth Vader alarm clock.  I think daddy was a bit jealous!

The boys...they are SO OLD!  This is one of their last Christmas's at home before their missions.  Wow...that is insane!

Dylan made some great clay magnets for grandma and grandpa.

The girls got some great musical books that they are obsessed with at the moment.  Also, check out the rad PJ's!  Thanks Uncle Timmy!  Dylan LOVES Finn from the Cars movie, and of course the girls are in love with princesses. Great job Westies!

Christmas Morning:

Obscene?  Yes!  Worth it?  Heck yes!

Syd got some things for her kitchen! The kids like to play "Grocery Store" and "Restaurant" together. (ALL THREE OF THEM!)  Two people are the customers and the thrid is the cash register or cook.  I love watching them play together.

Dylan got lots of legos stuff this year.  e also made daddy a light saber  pen for work.  Saweet!

Pardon my morning puffy face, but aren't these kids the sweetest?  

Yes this is a cardboard box that I decided to turn into a puppet theater at 10 pm 2 nights before Christmas.  It turned out great huh!?  I went through my craft closet and whalah!  A work of art! The kids LOVE it and use it everyday! 

We woke Macey up about 30 minutes after the kids to get her ready for church.  Shes a cuddle bug in the mornings

She opened her stocking before church.  Pop tarts!  YUMM!

Santa Baby

Syd's baby and me dress up set...Thanks grandma Minnie!  She is in LOVE with princess Tiana...she wore this dress all morning.

Aunt Karen sent the greatest books for the kids!  We haven't gone one night without reading a story out of every book that she sent.  The Bersnstein Bears, and Little Critter books are classics.  I love them...and my kids are totally learning from the messages in them.  Thanks Aunt Karen!  Dylan and I are going to start the Boxcar books this week once school gets back in! 

Grammer and Grandpa sent 3 huge boxes of my childhood stuff.  It could not have been more fun to go through those.  Here are some of the favorites:

Teddy Ruxpin and Grubby with 8 books and cassette tapes.  Sydney is obsessed with these guys, and occasionally tries to ride Grubby.  I can't believe they still work, and I can't believe they are in my living room!  SO FUN!

DRESS UP!

Dylan had fun with the wigs.  This wig in particular was on the ground after we had cleaned up and Sydney started crying and freaking out screaming, "Marely's hair, oh no, Marleys hair!" Poor girl thought it had all fallen off our dog.

I could not have been more stoked when we pulled these out of the boxes.  This was my space girl costume as a kid.  Syd rocks it well!  Dylan of course loves the dragon too.  My mom made these for us kids.  Aren't they awesome!?

Here are some pics that we took throughout the day:

Sydney's lined up her  friends in a meet and greet and started introducing them all to each other

These princesses I got at a consignment store for 3 bucks each! They are perfect for syd's little tea party.  She wakes up to a tea party and goes to sleep to a tea party (I'm not kidding...at this very moment she has the tea set at the bottom of her feet in bed (since she sleeps on the floor)  

Santa brought Dylan the only thing he really wanted!  A jeep battery for his broken down jeep! The excitement when he opened that gift was amazing....BEST...VALIDATOR...EVER! The kids live for that thing.  They can all ride together!

Its the hill to the polar express!

And last but definitely not least:

This blanket marks out ten year anniversary together.  My mother who suffers with MS designed this and made it all. The fabrics are from the tables of our wedding.  We had theme tables and these were the tablecloths.  Let me see if I can remember the tables: First date, kids, Shakespeare, Broadway, kids, DP (our high school), cow, candy, Simpsons, Temple (wedding), volleyball, NY,  and our proposal table.  Each table had goodies, and things on it that represented both of us.  It was a wedding that displayed our love for each other and each others interests. It was a fun idea, and definitely represented our personalities well.  We don't ever take ourselves too seriously, and we have a LOT of fun!  I love you mom for doing this.  I LOVE it and know that it will be an heirloom in our family for generations. It is truly amazing!!!

This blanket above is what made my Christmas!  The love and time that went into that is beyond me and I was in awe of it.  On top of this, Cameron gave me a Kindle Fire! I love it! And by love I mean, LOVE!  I am a bit obsessed with it and have read 3 books in the last 6 days.  I was definitely spoiled this year.  A blanket, some jewelry, shoes, and heirloom, and a kindle...wow.  I am one lucky girl!

It was a fabulous Christmas with lots of gifts, food, and smiling faces.  I can't wait another 365 days till we can do it again.  In the meantime, I have 2 upcoming birthday parties to prepare for.  UGH!

Happy New Years! 2012-2022

Happy New Years! 

I am fast approaching my 30s and am a bit freaked out about it.  Birthdays have NEVER bothered me, but for some reason this one has gotten my patties all in a bunch.  I have heard a lot of great things and not so great (mostly having to do with weight) things.  So I have decided that this New Years I would like to make resolutions for my 30’s. My top 5 resolutions before I reach 40 are:

1. Consistently average 6+ hours a night (hopefully 8) This would be an amazing change from the last 6 years. This would help with the dark circles under my eyes, allow my brain to function more properly (in order to accomplish #2), and aid in helping my tolerance and patience levels.

2.  As a result to having all three kids enter school, I am planning on going back to school to get my nursing license.  This is super exciting for me to think about, I just have to make sure that I do it and not get lazy about it.  It truly is a dream of mine to be an advocate for women in the birthing rooms of a hospital.  Ever since delivering my first child, I KNEW that this is what I truly wanted to do.

3. Find a job that I love that with allow me to be both a mother and employee.  My vision is to work a few nights a week and sleep when the kids are in school allowing me to be there for them every day!  I know that this can be accomplished (since the night shifts are usually the most available), again though, I need to NOT be lazy about it and DO IT!  Thinking about working again makes my heart flutter just a tad.  I have always enjoyed working and contributing to the family, but I never wanted to put my kids in daycare or nanny care to do it.  So, once they are in school, all systems are a go! 

4. Lose ten lbs and get in shape or, at least stay where I am as of right now.  I hear that metabolism starts to slow in the 30’s so I am determined to start eating right and making sure that as mine slows, I don’t see the difference in my “body fat” (as Dylan would say).   Losing weight isn’t as important as feeling better and being in shape either.  I am beginning to see the sag in my body, (in more places that I would like) and I would love to tighten it all up. 

5.  Get fixed.  This body here is off limits for bearing any more children, and I plan on making that permanent 

in the near future.  Sorry to all of you who think that I am “kidding” but this factory is closed! 

I CANT WAIT TO SEE WHAT MY 30’S BRING!  HELP ME REMEMBER AND REACH MY GOALS!

&!$%

Yes we are Mormon, but we too are people.  And as people we sometimes on occasion let our mouths fly.  I usually do it when I get hurt…it’s just an instinct.  Should I mention it has happened twice on two separate occasions at church events?  (A church volleyball game where I came down on my ankle, and softball game where I got clocked in the back with a ball. Painful? Yes. Hilarious? Oh yes. Embarrassing?  Maybe had the people not known me, but I am one that doesn’t really apologize for that sort of thing…so it was fine)  Anyway, in the last two days these events have happened which has caused us to really sit down and decide to crack down on our potty mouths:

1.  I was cooking over the stove and the grease popped up and got my arm. I immediately yelled "shit" while all three of my kids were sitting behind me at the dinner table ready for their meal to be served.  Great! They all looked a bit shocked as to what just happened then Macey (my 19 month old) quickly and loudly says "shit" and then started laughing. It was priceless. It still makes me chuckle just seeing her face as she said it.  

2.  Yesterday on the way a New Years Eve Party, Dylan says in the back seat, "what the hell is that?"  I immediately turn to Cameron who is driving with a look of, "did he really just say that?" Cameron kinda made a face but didn't say anything (apparently praying that Dylan wouldn’t say what he was about to say).  I preceded to then ask Dylan where he had heard that saying and thinking it was from school or the bus and he says, "I heard it today on the game daddy was playing, but don't worry, I am sorry, I know it's a bad word. Are you mad at me mommy?"  I answer, "No Dylan, it's not you I am mad at” glaring at Cameron who knew from the beginning that he was in the dog house.  He just started laughing.  What a punk!  Ugh...I tell you, those video games are NO GOOD!  We have a deal that he can't play them while the kids are awake...BUT…I took a nap yesterday…

I clearly don't pretend to be one of those people who have it all together. I think it is unhealthy and the cause of many insecurities in our culture (especially our religious one).   But I would like to think that that those people who seem to have their perfect little lives with their perfect little children sometimes let their mouths fly, and sometimes, just sometimes find the humor in it.  Oh what I would pay to see one of these perfect little women just spout out some profanities…both for their sake and mine.